Cutting ourselves short of Love...
Within one-tenth of a second of seeing a new face, you’ve already made a judgment about what that person is like. - Jean Haner
We have all been there. We see someone, hear someone speaking, or hear something about someone without having met them and we make a judgment about them. There have been times when I felt my judgments were justified, 'I can judge her, because I know shes said something about me', and there are other times I have simply just bought into someone else's belief of another person. I am not proud of either of these. When I judge someone I'm cutting myself short of the Love I could extend to them, and in return the Love that I would receive...its really a losing battle.
I have learned that when I make a judgment about someone, or a situation, I need to stop, look at myself and ask 'Where in my life I do that, or where I have done that in the past?'. An example, there's a person who I continue to have judgments about because they don't have a job, and are making no effort to find one. It makes me really angry, and then I make judgments about them. Instead, I now look at myself and recognize pieces of me in them and their situation. So I'm not really angry at that person or their choices, but mad at myself because there are many times where I cut myself short of being my absolute best. At which point I can now be gentle on myself, have compassion for the other person, and start to make changes to MY life. I am responsible for how I'm feeling, and I never want to project it onto the people in my life who I Love so dearly. The blame game is a dangerous one to play, and it was one that used to be really great at, and there are still times I find myself playing. However, now that I am more aware, I can quickly bring it back to me and get curious about what the real issue is!! How empowering is that...I LOVE IT!!! : )
Making judgments is human nature, and is something that we all do, but that doesn't mean we cant do something about it, or learn a new way to think or look at things. Don't beat yourself up....just do something different!!
We have all been there. We see someone, hear someone speaking, or hear something about someone without having met them and we make a judgment about them. There have been times when I felt my judgments were justified, 'I can judge her, because I know shes said something about me', and there are other times I have simply just bought into someone else's belief of another person. I am not proud of either of these. When I judge someone I'm cutting myself short of the Love I could extend to them, and in return the Love that I would receive...its really a losing battle.
I have learned that when I make a judgment about someone, or a situation, I need to stop, look at myself and ask 'Where in my life I do that, or where I have done that in the past?'. An example, there's a person who I continue to have judgments about because they don't have a job, and are making no effort to find one. It makes me really angry, and then I make judgments about them. Instead, I now look at myself and recognize pieces of me in them and their situation. So I'm not really angry at that person or their choices, but mad at myself because there are many times where I cut myself short of being my absolute best. At which point I can now be gentle on myself, have compassion for the other person, and start to make changes to MY life. I am responsible for how I'm feeling, and I never want to project it onto the people in my life who I Love so dearly. The blame game is a dangerous one to play, and it was one that used to be really great at, and there are still times I find myself playing. However, now that I am more aware, I can quickly bring it back to me and get curious about what the real issue is!! How empowering is that...I LOVE IT!!! : )
Making judgments is human nature, and is something that we all do, but that doesn't mean we cant do something about it, or learn a new way to think or look at things. Don't beat yourself up....just do something different!!
“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”
-Mother Teresa-
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